Ringkasan dibuat dengan bantuan AI • Belum diverifikasi
Ceramah ini membahas tentang bagaimana membangun budaya yang baik, baik dalam kehidupan sehari-hari maupun dalam praktik meditasi. Ajahn Sampasadana memulai dengan mengutip Karaniya Metta Sutta, menekankan pentingnya memahami asal-usul budaya yang membentuk kehidupan kita. Ia kemudian memandu meditasi untuk menyadari hubungan dengan momen saat ini, menggunakan napas dan sensasi untuk menumbuhkan kebahagiaan dan kualitas batin yang indah. Dalam sesi tanya jawab, Ajahn menjawab berbagai pertanyaan praktis, seperti mengatasi rasa malu dengan menyelidiki sensasi fisik dan melonggarkan ketegangan, memahami keindahan napas dalam meditasi, mempraktikkan keseimbangan batin sebagai hati yang menampung segala sesuatu, mengaitkan prokrastinasi dengan kekacauan internal, dan menghadapi duka dengan mengenang momen indah serta menyadari bahwa kualitas orang yang dicintai tetap hidup dalam diri kita. Pesan utamanya adalah bahwa budaya batin yang baik dibangun melalui kesadaran, penerimaan, dan kebijaksanaan dalam menghadapi berbagai pengalaman hidup.
This is what should be done by one who is skilled in goodness and who knows the path of peace.
Let them be able and upright, straightforward and gentle in speech,
humble and not conceited, contented and easily satisfied,
unburdened with duties and frugal in their ways,
peaceful and calm and wise and skilful, not proud and demanding in nature.
Let them not do the slightest thing that the wise would later reprove,
wishing in gladness and in safety, may all beings be happy.
Whatever living beings there may be, whether they are weak or strong, omitting none,
the great or the mighty, medium, short or small,
the seen and the unseen, those living near and far away,
those born and to be born, may all beings be happy.
Let none deceive another or despise any being in any state.
Let none through anger or ill will wish harm upon another.
Even as a mother protects with her life her child, her only child,
so with a boundless heart should one cherish all living beings,
radiating kindness over the entire world,
spreading upwards to the skies and downwards to the depths,
outwards and unbounded, freed from hatred and ill will,
whether standing or walking, seated or lying down, free from drowsiness,
one should sustain this recollection,
this is said to be the sublime abiding by not holding to fixed views,
a pure-hearted one, having clarity of vision,
being freed from all sense desires, is not born again into this world.
Okay.
Well, one of the things that would be perhaps interesting to talk about is culture.
Culture is something which happens everywhere.
It's part of...
It's part of... It's part of... It's part of... It's part of...
It's part of our everyday lives.
And it occurs pretty much everywhere.
Something that we never even notice or stop to think about.
But culture is really important from a Buddhist point of view.
To understand how it formed, how it created,
that it's a constantly changing phenomena,
that it's conditionally arisen.
It is what we make it in other words.
But what's special about culture as large is we can see
when there's positive sides to it and negative sides of it it's not about building a utopia
of course but it's about seeing how all this came to be because once we can recognize
the culture as it is and we can understand the history of how we've arrived at this place
all of a sudden it's no longer a mystery and a lot of the trouble disappears from that
it might not be a pretty picture but at least we can understand how we got here
and that allows us then to move forward how can we now live in such a complicated world in such
a chaotic world we can start to make better informed decisions but most importantly in
understanding culture externally we can start to understand culture internally we can understand
how our mind came to be as such our character our qualities our strengths our weaknesses
and all that comes very useful in meditation what is the culture we're creating in meditation
when we close our eyes a lot of the time we just sit there and just expect meditation kind
of thing to happen but a lot of the time it's setting a beautiful foundation setting a beautiful
culture in our heart and our heads to be able to let meditation to happen to be able to delight
in the present moment
and be free in the present moment and this is a very very major point of the buddhist practice
something we really don't talk about very often or consider very often a lot of the time we kind
of think that it's more a sort of exotic or esoteric kind of state of mind that we have to
to find insight into but actually it's insight into our everyday life it's about insight into
just our ordinariness just to be free in the present moment and be free in the present moment
and to live in the present moment it's not about just being here what is it like just to be here
because this is where it gets tricky we often think about the first noble
truth the four noble truths as large as being intense suffering and intense craving and all
this kind of stuff but no it's all to do about our everyday life it's about our everyday sensory
experiences so just to to see ties the eyes out to hear ties the ears to touch the soul as it is
taste, to smell, to feel, is tiring to the body.
It's uncomfortable in a lot of cases.
And that makes us move all the time, we're constantly readjusting, trying to soothe things,
trying to make things all okay.
And that's fine, that's a perfectly natural response to the situation.
But it's making that connection, we do this because of the situation, that becomes very
empowering, and very freeing, because all of a sudden we can understand, through mindfulness,
through basic insight practice and everything else, how our mind and body interact, and
how our mind and body interact with the world.
What kind of culture are we creating in response to this?
Because by and large, we're all looking for a sense of respite, a sense of rest.
And that comes sometimes intense, from, you know, we just want things to be okay.
Things to go away, and we just, or we just want to rest our eyes for a few minutes and
get some peace and quiet that way, to recover from ordinary life.
And this movement all the time creates so much dissatisfaction, because we can never
be still, we can never enjoy the present moment.
It's constantly creating all this energy that needs to resolve itself.
And yet it didn't necessarily need to do that.
And apart from respite, we want uplift, we want pleasure, we want comfort, we want happiness.
And again, we're looking for this all the time.
And then we're also looking for the freedom as such.
You know, we're constantly getting lost in ideas and beliefs and everything else to try
and make sense, to try and get certainty and security and a direction in life.
And yet too.
And this is very, very useful, very, very important.
But it all becomes a cultural implication that becomes quite important.
And the issue is, even if we make utopia, even if we make life perfect, even if we spend
all our time having wonderful meditation and joy and all that wonderful stuff, the real
world keeps coming through.
There's no barrier to prevent the real world coming through.
There's no way to prevent it.
All the time.
All the stuff in the first noble truth.
It's always been there.
So no matter what we do, no matter how perfect we make things, life will still be what it
is.
And that's okay.
It's all about changing our perception, how we relate to the world, how we relate internally
the culture we create inside.
It's all about how we move forward.
See?
The ancient Greeks in their philosophy were talking about eudaimonia.
And this basically means the happiness which lasts, the unchanging happiness so to speak.
And in their model, it's built on virtue.
The lasting happiness that is built on virtue.
And a large part of the ancient philosophy is debating what virtue is.
Which of course, you know, Socrates is a great example of this, but so is Plato and Aristotle,
and all the others.
others, spent an awful lot of time debating exactly what virtue is.
And yet from a Buddhist point of view, we have something very similar but from a different
perspective.
So we accept lasting happiness does come from virtue.
This is why we have the precepts.
This is why we have good karma.
This is why we have all these practices to make life meaningful, to make life beautiful.
Not for the sake of perfection, because the real world is still going to come through.
The real world is still going to be as it is.
None of us are getting any younger.
But at the same time, the question is different.
So the focus then comes not on what is virtue, but what is this thing we're trying to save?
What is this self, this soul that we're trying to liberate?
It becomes a different question, but has a very, very different answer because it takes
us in a very different direction.
Because at the heart of the issue is our everyday life, is just how to be happy in
this present moment.
Because when we don't do these things, we suffer even more.
It becomes unbearable a lot of the time.
And yet the solution was still there.
So it's not essentially doing all these things to be a wonderful Buddhist and be perfectly
a good human being.
It's more to give life meaning.
To make life beautiful.
To build a good life, but also to build a good culture inside.
To build a good relationship with ourselves.
To bring the heart and the head together.
Because there's a reconciliation problem.
When we can't get these things to make sense, it creates conflict within the mind.
We're constantly trying to turn this stuff over to, how did we end up like this?
How do we make the world make sense?
When actually the evidence was all there.
Human beings are human beings.
And the beautiful thing about this is knowing how to bring all this together.
Is that when we're trying to create a perfect world where we're safe, where we're protected,
where we'll never have to experience any unhappiness or dissatisfaction or suffering
or anything.
We will never accomplish this.
Right?
the real world will keep on coming through there's no barrier that will ever accomplish this
and of course if there was we'd all be doing it there'd be no reason for us to be
in robes or to be here meditating there'd be no point because we could accomplish our own
happiness and our own safety we would never have to rely on any of this stuff and yet here we are
because we know deep down that the real world keeps coming through because we're not separate
from the real world we're not separate from the rest of reality or the rest of the universe and
in many ways it's a beautiful thing it's what makes us human is what makes us more alive that
we are part of something much much bigger in terms of life as a whole but not just stuck in
our small little thought bubbles
of this I, me, mine. We can step outside of this. We created all this just to navigate the world
and that's perfectly fine. That's perfectly good. And yet the real world still comes through.
Perhaps the reason we're so unsatisfied is that we set this identity, this ego identity to
keep us safe and yet it will never accomplish this. Perhaps we were asking the wrong question.
How do we be happy? But is that the question we're really asking?
Who knows? See, that's the thing. What is it, the culture that we have created inside? What is it
we're really looking for? Are we really looking for a meaningful life that we can be okay with
the trauma, the stress, the chaos, all the stuff that happens in the world, as well as all the
beautiful stuff, the joy, the happiness, the happiness, the happiness, the happiness, the
generosity, the giving, the community, the friendship, all the love and everything else
that's so wonderful in the world. Can we be open to that as well? It's a very big question.
Many of us, in response to the chaos, we block this stuff out because it becomes too painful.
We're dealing with such extremes in today's world. It becomes unbearable. And yet realistically,
we've kind of created this world. We've created this world. We've created this world. We've created
a paradigm, a culture inside of us, which creates our own unhappiness. Everybody wants to be
happy, and we're running into the very things that will make us miserable. And the beauty of
understanding how these things are dependently arisen allows us to see that we can change our
culture in here and in here. We can change our mind. We can bring in more beautiful,
more beautiful qualities, fully knowing that it's not going to make the world perfect,
fully knowing it's not going to make a utopia, fully knowing that it won't make us a happy ever
after. But who cares? It was never going to be perfect. So we don't have to make it be perfect.
That's the beauty of it. We can be free in this, in accepting the hardship and accepting the
beautiful at the same time.
There is no doubt that there is a vulnerability to being free. What we need to do today is
not be paranoid. This is so important. Because once frontiers are relaxed, at this time,
this is where we can take good care of each other, dust all over the place, at this time,
we realize that healing, that people are present here is not going to become well. Ordinary
fix the world the world is perfectly fine as it was and the same for us we're perfectly fine as we
are it's more a matter of connecting to what is more beautiful and this is where wisdom and
compassion comes in because it is rational to live a good life and it is compassionate to live
a good life and it is irrational to live a self-suffering life and it is certainly not
compassionate to live a suffering life so it becomes more a matter of making these informed
choices being mindful and delighting in the ordinariness because that's the thing that
terrifies most people is this ordinariness we're constantly trying to get away from it
trying to spice life up trying to make things more intense and alive that's why we like spicy food
and loud music and intense experiences skydiving and bungee
jumping and all these these things that people want intense experiences for and yet the problem
is all they really do is take us further away from the solution they just make us more miserable
they give us a rush of energy and a thrill and a moment of happiness and then comes the hollowness
we feel more empty afterwards but how can that be right if these things are supposed to make us
happy as the advertised
us tell us they will then why isn't it doing so maybe there's something wrong with the premise
or maybe it just wasn't ever gonna work and that's the thing it's all coming down to understanding
not only how the world is but how we can make the best of it how we can live life in a quality way
where it doesn't matter whether it's perfect or imperfect because that's that's the thing if it
was all on us then it wasn't going to work because of course it doesn't matter whether it's perfect
all wonderful and everything else, it would be so artificial. It would be so in almost
demeaning because we would lose the opportunity to be challenged, to grow in difficult circumstances,
to really see our own strengths, to see how creative we can be in difficult scenarios,
and to find joy and happiness in things which sometimes seem so joyless and so depressing.
Because that's the thing. All the stuff in the first noble truth wasn't really the problem.
It's always going to come through. It's always going to be there. This is just what it is to
be alive. This is what it is to be human. But the problem is we have an internal conflict that's
trying to make us go in a different direction.
To try and have something different. To make it be something different. And yet we will
never accomplish this. And that's okay. It's coming to terms with the fact that that's
okay. Because the second noble truth is basically that all this unhappiness, this dissatisfaction,
this suffering is because it's not okay for us. Because we're constantly trying to make
it be something else. We're trying to make it...
We're trying to fight it. We're trying, you know, have all these wants and desires and cravings for
it to be different. And if we can't have those, we lose ourselves in distractions and desires and
fantasies and in some cases nightmares. And to build this fortress that we can feel safe in. And
yet it was all unnecessary. It was all unnecessary. The fortress will never keep us safe. And yet the
price we pay for it...
Is huge. Because now all of a sudden, we feel so disconnected from each other. We feel so disconnected from the rest of life.
From the rest of the world. That's the price we pay to separate ourselves in that way. To create a barrier from the rest of life.
From the ordinariness. Then we are instantly disconnected. And we will never find happiness in that state. Because it is always this
inner conflict. This competition. This need to create. This need to be. And, you know, you just spend five minutes looking at
advertising. And every year the, you know, the things that we're supposed to be having. New cars. New holidays. New houses. New
jewellery and technology and whatevers. It's never ending. It's just the same stuff over and over and over. And that's where it gets
interesting. We never needed all this stuff.
Why are we so afraid of the present moment? Why are we trying to be in the present moment, when there's nowhere else to be but the present moment?
What is our relationship to it? What is the culture we have in here in relationship to the present moment? Because this is where it gets subtle.
It's a bit like a soup pot.
This is a metaphor I've been using for many years. It's kind of a work in progress.
But what to do. When we have our soup pot, we can see the ingredients inside it. Maybe there's a lump of pasta. Maybe there's a lump of vegetable or something.
We can see what these things are. And that's fine. We know what they are. We can recognise them. Sometimes there's ingredients in that soup pot which we can't see
because they've dissolved into it. But we can taste them. We know they're there. We can smell them. And that's sort of the interesting thing.
What is it we're putting into this soup pot?
Because sometimes we might be looking at our soup pot going, wow, this is so beautiful,
so wonderful.
It looks so good and tasty.
And we're there drinking this soup and going, but it's got this strange bitter almond aftertaste.
Maybe that's just a regional delicacy and I should have some more.
It's like, no, we shouldn't because the bitter almond taste is poison.
And that's the thing.
We're drinking this culture.
We're imbibing it.
We're consuming it mindlessly.
And it might be killing us.
It might look really good and really attractive.
And yet it's based on an unattainable fantasy that we just need to have this car or this
product and then everything will be fine.
And of course it won't.
What is it that we're putting in?
Why are we chasing after the things that are just going to make us miserable, that are
going to keep us looking for the things that are going to make us miserable?
Or the next thing, hoping that it's going to make us happy?
And when we come into our meditation, what is the culture we're creating there?
What is the soup pot of our mind, basically?
What's in it?
You sit down to meditate.
Is there happiness?
Is there joy?
Is there a sense of, I've done good in my life today?
The sense of looking forward to meditating, the sense of ease.
Because all those things are a basic part of the practice, is developing these beautiful
qualities because they enrich our lives and they enrich our meditation.
We're no longer having to create happiness in our meditation because it's already there.
The moment we try and manufacture this stuff, it becomes a bit artificial.
And yet when we connect to that happiness that's already inside of us, then it becomes
beautiful.
It becomes effortless, enriching.
It never ends.
And that's something that we just can't buy.
That's just something we can't create.
But it's there for all of us.
It is what we make it.
And that's the beauty of the whole practice.
That's how it all kind of comes together from starting to live a good life, the precepts,
generosity, good karma.
And these things don't have to be big expensive gestures.
Just spending time with a loved one, just visiting your neighbour or whatever.
And other basic rituals which make us happy as well.
Going for a nice walk in the park or spending time looking at the sunrise or the sunset
or spending time in nature.
Same thing.
It helps us connect back to the present moment and find that joy and beauty again.
And then the more we see it around us, the more we can allow it to be in here.
Because it was already in there.
There's no separation as such from us and the rest of the world.
So why did we think that joy and happiness were separate to us?
Why did we think that loving kindness and compassion and all these other beautiful qualities
were separate from us?
At the beginning, for sure, we have to practice these things because we're not so familiar
with them.
So we have to try to have loving kindness for ourselves.
We have to try to have loving kindness for our loved ones and our acquaintances and
those who drive us crazy.
That's part of the practice.
That's part of the training.
But eventually we see actually that love has always been there.
And it wants to express, it wants to come out.
The heart is longing to let this stuff go and be free.
So we connect.
We connect to that instead.
We start our meditation connecting to that, this present moment, and allowing that joy,
that freedom to come out, to grow, and to share, to spread.
May all beings be happy.
It was always there, and that's the thing.
Realising it was always there, even though no matter what happens, we can always reconnect
to it.
But at the beginning, it was there.
We have to practise this stuff in order to find that it was always there.
And that's a lot of what building this good culture inside of ourselves is really all
about.
Building that happiness.
Building a good life, a good relationship with ourselves.
And that trust.
The trust of discovering that we're a lot stronger than we thought we were.
That we had more skills in life than we thought we did.
That we had more skills in life than we thought we did.
That we were able to navigate things which seemed so unbearable.
And yet really we were able to do that.
And that trust is really strengthening.
And fortunately life throws us enough challenges anyway.
We don't have to go looking for them.
So another level that the practise becomes easy.
We don't have to try and look for trouble to challenge ourselves.
Life's challenging more than enough.
And that's fine too.
It's all an opportunity.
It's all an opportunity to make it beautiful.
Not for the sake of some abstract perfection of beauty kind of thing.
Some aesthetic.
Some cold and distant thing.
But just the fact that it's wise and compassionate to do so.
There's no other reason for it.
There's no separation.
The real world isn't going to go away.
There's no separation.
But we can change the cultural relationship we have to it.
And to each other.
And so with that, let's jump into meditation.
So as usual, everyone please stand up.
Give yourself a bit of a stretch.
Adjust your clothes if you need to.
Adjust your cushion.
Adjust your chair.
And do all the things you need to do.
Okay.
And when we're ready, we can settle into our chair.
Close our eyes.
And see what happens.
And just be present.
With this body and mind.
How does it feel?
What is our relationship to this present moment?
And what is it that we can give the present moment?
At the beginning, things can seem all jumbled up and out of order.
And that's okay.
It's just about settling in.
Relaxing the body.
And relaxing the mind.
Perfectly fine to readjust the body as you need it.
For the first few minutes, the joints will relax.
They'll change shape.
So change shape with it.
And as we're settling in, use your breathing.
All the sensations.
All the emotions.
Anything that comes up.
Use those to spread happiness, comfort and rest in this moment.
So what is it that your mind turns towards?
Is your mind trying to escape into thoughts?
Is your mind trying to reach your heart?
and fantasies and feelings if it is that's okay but we turn it back to looking at what it's trying
to run away from and to be compassionate to that to try and relax and soothe to be a friend to what
we're trying to run away from in these last few minutes let's ask how we can create a beautiful
culture within ourselves in our hearts and our heads to be open to these beautiful qualities to
connect with happiness and joy and compassion and to delight in them when we create a better
culture inside ourselves to be free to be free from fear free from regrets free from sorrow
and free from aversion and hatred
what is it that we can give ourselves to create a good life open your eyes and as always if anyone
has any questions please feel free to ask um can i uh it's not half of this question but i like to
i like to report on my practice it's not really report but i'll share my practice to you when
when you come um so one thing i was doing
recently is like i like every day i write down what i appreciate myself and then what i appreciate
other people and then i think it helps me it helps it it helps me in a way that um
like i i i'm not that i'm not so self-critic critic it's self-critical
in a way that improves a bit but sometimes i feel like it's like um i have very hard time
i still have like very hard time when shame come up and i think it happens a lot especially when
i am like when i interacted with other people or like when i make a mistake or sometimes just
out of nowhere and i think that is like
that that kind of feeling i don't know how to describe it but it's like the kind of feeling
like i want to put my hand into my stomach and pull those organs out like it's that kind of
feeling and it's very uncomfortable in a way and i think when the feelings come up
i have a hard time like being kind to myself and stuff
and i just wonder like if there is any any like anything i can not really i don't know anything
that i can incline more towards like it's a hard emotion to accept but like yeah but in a way that
i can accept the feeling more and being kinder to myself when it happens
there's quite a lot of of really interesting things there
one of the things that this is often tied to is more of an instinct that there's sort of an image
that we have created of either what we think we should be or what we want to be or sometimes what
we're told that we should be and when we feel that we can't accomplish that or the words just come
out of our mouths or thoughts just pop into our heads which contradict that image
there's conflict there's this tension this you know make it go away kind of thing
and very often that is felt in the stomach very often that's felt also in the chest area this
this tension and it's what's very interesting is to actually study this physical sensation
because a lot of the emotions that arise is in response to the physical sensation
so a lot of the time we have this image then the physical response and then the response to the
physical response and that can actually entrap us so this feeling of tightness and tension and
feeling of inner disharmony so to speak because we can't step out of it it kind of perpetuates
and grows and festers and it sort of consumes our life and we can't actually see any way out of that
because when there's any sort of basic suffering so to speak it clouds the mind the mind becomes
tense it can't
see a positive outcome and it kind of slumps into that tension and that that discomfort and yet one
of the best tricks is to relax the body sometimes giving yourself a bit of a tummy rub going for a
walk this is one of the remarkable things that i point out to a lot of people when they start
meditating and they're just thinking thinking thinking and it just does not go away well maybe
it's not the thoughts that are the problem maybe you've just got a crick in your shoulder maybe it's
an ache in your knee or something else and you just adjust the posture a bit
and whoosh it just disappears
so a lot of this is actually seeing how this sensation is locking us into a habit pattern
locking us into feeling imprisoned and that we can't see any way forward so is there kind of a
fear response or an anxiety that arises whenever the sensation occurs you mean is it like like a
response to the anxiety
mm-hmm i think it's more like i think it's more like insecurity in general
it's like it's that sort of feeling like it's that sort of feeling i want to disappear somewhere and
then it's yeah and then when that happens i can feel that in my stomach and then but like i cannot
really
relax it as well i have part time doing i have hard time doing that i think
i think i usually have a lot of tension in my stomach and it's not something that i can
relax it if that make any sense like i try to i i try to
do it it's not really do it but like in meditation and in stuff and whenever i
go into it my body will like resist sort of like like if i try to like if i it's like if there is
a force that preventing me to go into that and then because this is not really um exactly related
but i tried to go to hypno hypnotherapy like a while ago and then but that also
like does not work because my body is like trying to receive in any way every way possible
and this is actually very consistent is that a lot of the times we get these sensations that come up
and they occur in different parts of the body for different people
but the moment that sensation starts to rise that resistance kicks in
and that resistance is really fascinating to study because it's that resistance that kind of locks us
in to that experience so the resistance is making the tension worse it can prolong it
it can keep it going there so it's kind of like we have a a feeling that we want to disappear
the habitual response to the instinctive response to that is this tension in the tummy
and then the resistance to that tension what does that do does it make it worse
it's a question of is there yeah maybe you know i'm not sure about this i need to i need to study
yeah it's it's fascinating to watch the sequence as it arises because a lot of the time it's a
very kind of repetitive pattern for example if if this feeling arises again would it arise somewhere
other than the stomach usually it's in the stomach yeah and that's it's yeah it's in the stomach
and that's the thing when those things are connected we can kind of see how the
sequence plays out and a lot of the time this also leads for people who have say panic attacks
there's usually this impulse that starts and it just grows and grows and grows and grows and then
it just collapses into strong anxiety or real horrible feelings
it's being trapped in those physical sensations that is kind of making it worse
and so a lot of the times even if we can't say physically relax it or
mentally relax it a lot of the time the most effective thing is just to say go for a walk and
to remove ourself from sort of the the space in which that that happens but a lot of it always
comes down to also questioning this image that we have of ourselves why is it that we feel
you know is is it say words has come out of our mouth and you feel embarrassed or it's it's right
it's it's questioning sort of this measurement we have of what we think we should be
and sort of saying is it rational to hold on to that is it compassionate to hold on to that
so a lot of the time it's it's challenging the impulse itself
and investigating that as well as looking at the sequences arises
so it's
generally a slow process but there's lots of little wins in there and when you start to feel
ah there it is there's this pattern this is how it sort of evolves into a sequence
and you can slow it down and shall we say play with it a bit and even though in your
when you're in a challenging situation when there's people you don't really have time to do
that but there's times that you can go back to your room or to a quiet place and experiment with
it that way and to see if there's another way that we can redirect that energy but at the same time
to adjust the original concept of ourselves to something that's more okay with you know this
mind and this body not behaving this mind and body not listening to us and saying sometimes
crazy stuff it's like where did this come from and being okay with that and to laugh at it
and that's one of the big things is to laugh at how crazy it all is
okay thank you so much oh no problem hope it helps it helps a lot i will share with you again
if you come again hopefully they haven't sacked me yet
okay so um we have two people raising up their hands so uh maybe moody
moody first yeah thank you um thanks for the talk i had a question on um i've been learning
meditation through john brown's book i've been doing for a year and a half now um i was just
at a question about this his chapter on the beautiful breath on the 16 steps and so when
it comes to my experience when i do it and you know sometimes you follow the breath naturally
and at one point
there's like these early um bright moving not bright but like dim moving lights and i kind
of ignore them um but then later um like there's a lot of like joy happiness and maybe even like
physical sensations and sometimes they take over and i lose the breath and i was wondering at that
time when those physical or the happiness joy sensations take over um at what point do you know
when to let the breath go and when when to get back to the breath because i've been getting stuck
between sometimes going back and forth and i tried the letting go part but sometimes it just keeps
going back and forth and then getting into the dull state kind of thing thank you no problem the
dullness is really interesting because a lot of the time when we have this joy it's a huge amount
of energy and it's beautiful
is we're kind of like a a light bulb that's getting a very dim wattage it's we're not quite
used to having all this joy come up and all this energy so what we then do is we then tie it
afterwards so it's kind of like at the moment we're only used to getting a small amount of it
so what would the the goal is as such is to expand the culture to be able to
embrace it more and to allow it to grow more and be more spacious and open
and the beautiful breath as such arises naturally when there's just delight in being here when you
don't want to be anywhere else in the world when just being with the breath is the most
beautiful thing it becomes beautiful and that's that's sort of the thing a lot of people kind of
they're trying to make the breath be beautiful they're waiting for it to be beautiful
um as and it doesn't quite work that way because we're trying to manufacture it and there's a
sort of an inner resistance to that because we're interfering all the time and so it's not allowing
to evolve naturally but a lot of the process to be able to let it go deeper is almost like a kind of
self-respect this kind of respect for the happiness the ease how much joy it is just to let this stuff
go just for a little while and just to be present and to trust in that and that trust is really
really useful because then we feel comfortable with the happiness, with this largeness because
the expansion of the mind, so to speak, is unfamiliar to us.
If we're used to this, you know, ego world that we, you know, this is how we navigate
the world.
It's all familiar.
And now all of a sudden that's just softly fading away and it's kind of this more amorphous
space we're just not familiar with and it's dull and how do we navigate that?
That's perfectly fine.
It's more, okay, now we have this larger open space.
How do we fill it with something beautiful?
So when those sensations arise, those emotions arise, maybe it wants to go in that direction.
So instead of following the breath, maybe it wants you to practice metta or compassion
or joy.
Maybe it's asking you for something else.
And that's the thing.
In that mindfulness.
mindfulness, we can see that the mind and body are interacting as such as they're sending
us a message.
This is what we need to do to move forward.
But if we keep fixating, say on the breath or trying to make it be in a certain sequence,
a certain recipe, uh, it, it kind of, um, it doesn't really work that well for us, but
you know, the mind also kind of eventually sort of says, oh, we shouldn't even bother
because we're just trying to do the same thing over and over and over.
Um, and it kind of loses hope in a way.
So in, in a sense to let it go deeper and evolve naturally is to be present with it,
to be open to what it's asking of us and to, to share in the experience.
So, uh, hope that helps a bit.
Okay.
Do you want to say something?
I'll just say great to see you Ajahn Sampah, always lovely.
Thank you for a nice talk.
That was great.
That was really beautiful.
I had a question.
Um, we practice metta, we practice breathing, we practice content, we practice dana.
How do you actually practice equanimity?
Uh, equanimity is an interesting one because a lot of people, they kind of equanimity is
a bit of a problematic word in itself, because it's kind of implying that we are being, we
are being equanimous to life.
So we're trying to create this, um, experience where everything's okay, where realistically
that's actually made, that's artificial and that's provi, that, yeah, that's the thing,
isn't it?
When we try and create these feelings, they, they're not really true.
Whereas the, right, uh, equanimity is such, the upeka is kind of, I mean, I often describe
as a heart that can contain the entire universe.
So it's being okay with everything that comes and being open to, to everything as it is.
So yeah, it's, it's a state that we don't need to create.
It's realizing that's all okay.
And so, um, equanimity unfortunately has sometimes been presented as this kind of endurance, this
kind of, um.
Bootcamp style, you know, be tough and just bear with it and be a good little soldier
and all the rest of it.
And it's kind of, yeah, well, good luck with that.
It's not gonna work because, uh, it's doomed to fail from the beginning.
One of the interesting things is basically, um, the moment that we try and have a relationship
with something, it's a dualistic position.
Because it's me trying to have a relationship with something other.
And yet in these deeper states, the sense of self disappears, the sense of other disappears.
But if we're still trying to create a relationship within that, we're reasserting those, um,
dualities again.
So when everything's okay, there's no need to try and have a relationship because it's
all okay on its own.
There's no separation.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And in that, it's very freeing and very, um, it's, it's sort of understanding that's
all okay.
It doesn't matter what happens.
Thoughts come, thoughts go.
Emotions come, emotions go.
We spent enough time meditating that we've seen all thoughts and feelings are pretty
much all the same, whether they're happy or sad or beautiful or ugly or, you know, enticing
or scary, uh, they're all thoughts and feelings.
It's just more of the same.
And that's okay.
So there's the kind of ease that it really doesn't matter what pops into your head.
It's all okay.
So, uh, hope.
I just had a wonder.
That was beautiful.
That I just had an image of being one with the universe, like, like in a bubble almost,
but like just a small imagination.
And that whatever it is that makes me uncomfortable with the situation, I can see me rebounding
off the outside of the perimeter of the universe and having to come back to the situation.
So I see these little pokey holes going, trying to, cause I have so much energy and I have,
I mean, it's unending.
And I have so much creativity.
Creatives like curiosity.
I can't contain myself.
I have sensory overload quite often.
And so when things are not appearing to be okay, I start bouncing with it.
So I, I like that.
So it's really like, even Ajahn Sona said this, I think in the questions from Sunday
about
Wednesday.
When you're going to get it, we're just all one, you know, everything's okay, but it's
also quite a mess, you know, like, um, it's the way it is.
I don't know.
We got all the Ajahn's in that one, um, one answer, but, uh, yeah, that was a great answer.
Thank you so much.
I will work on my equanimity, um, and being.
Yeah.
A heart that can connect to the universe.
Thank you.
Great.
Thank you.
We received a question, um, from the chat, um, it says lately I have been procrastinating
on tidying up in my AC room.
Now I feel upset with myself, um, any tips?
Hmm.
Um.
Yeah.
There's a lot that can be to be put in that actually, because, uh, a lot of the time the
outside of our environment is a reflection of the inside.
So when our mind is a mess or it's conflicted or it's frustrated, it has no interest in
creating a beautiful, clean environment.
And unfortunately, um, it's very prevalent in, in society that.
Yeah.
When we suffer terribly, we can't bear to see beauty and happiness in the world.
So we destroy it.
So that's more an extreme case that how we, we can't bear other people to be happy.
So we, we can't bear ourselves to be happy in the same way, but with the environment
around us, keeping it clean and tidy is connected basically to how clean and tidy we feel inside.
Yeah.
Because when we have a joy in our environment, just have everything clean and tidy and simple.
It's because we're far more simple and at ease inside ourselves.
And so that resistance to the type, to having things more simple when it's full of clutter
and mess, really, what are we resisting?
What is this a reflection of?
A lot of the Zen traditions, for example, spend an awful lot of time cleaning everything
up.
And there's actually a lot, a lot in that.
Yeah.
And so to not make everything perfect, but to keep everything clean, our mind automatically
responds to that.
It's like when we walk into a beautiful scene, we instantly feel transcendent in a way.
And so we're in a clean environment, the same thing, but sometimes we don't want to transcend.
We want to stay in this little bubble, this little world of conflict.
And so we reject.
We reject having things clean and tidy, and we resist putting things away.
So there is actually a lot that can be in that question.
So if there's more that the questioner can give, that would be very, very helpful.
But one of the simplest ways of looking at it is because the outside is often a reflection
of the inside.
What is the inside like?
Is there a mess inside that you don't want to clean up?
Procrastinating there.
Trying to avoid having to deal with our own stuff can often be sort of projected externally
that we don't want to deal with all this stuff, all the mess around us.
So it's a very good question, but perhaps more can be asked on it to make it more specific.
So if there's any other questions?
Yes, there is one more question.
I'm sorry.
I've lost my brother four weeks ago and I'm having trouble dealing with this huge loss.
The best way to deal with, she wants to ask for the best way to deal with the grief when
it becomes unbearable.
Generally, a lot of the pain that comes from losing someone, sometimes it's because we
love them.
But sometimes because they're part of who we are.
So when they die, it's as if part of us has died as well.
So we might not only be grieving that they're no longer in our lives, but also because we've
lost something internally as well.
And in that kind of situation, it's, and it's very useful to check this, if that's the case,
then we can reflect more on the beautiful times that we had together, the beautiful
times you had with your brother.
Yeah.
All the qualities he had, the good and the bad, and the things that we can laugh about,
all the little quirks and, and all the little mementos inside us, that can actually mean
that they're still with us.
They're still part of us.
Because the fact that they're no longer physically there, we feel disconnected again, as if something
has been taken away from us.
And in a sense, of course, it's, they've passed away.
But internally, we still have so much.
They've so much quality time that you would have had together.
And it's remembering all those things means that you haven't really lost as much.
Because grief is so painful because it feels as if what is beautiful and what is happiness
can never happen again, as if happiness itself has died.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And we've been buried in a wooden box, or cremated and so on.
And we can never have it again.
And that's why it's so important to reconnect, to rediscover that happiness.
That joy, that compassion, all those beautiful qualities are still there.
And to refine them.
And we can do that very easily by remembering all the good times that you had with your
brother.
All the things that made you miss him so much.
are those qualities in you too are the things that he had that made him special are they in you too
you might be surprised that they are we're all human we all have beautiful qualities and that's
the thing we can still even though they're no longer physically present with us they're in
us still and the grief can be soothed so much by basically cherishing those beautiful moments
and at the same time in honor of that relationship is by sharing a good relationship with others how
has your relationship with your brother helped you grow as a human being and how you can share that
with others and help them grow too and you can help gift that experience that those skills those
wonderful qualities
you can give those back to him to wherever he is now so there's there's a lot that can be really uh
built on there because this is always a challenge we lose someone it's a shock to us it hits us hard
and it feels like we will never again have happiness we will never again have the joy
and all the beautiful things that we had together when it isn't necessarily
the end of the world those beautiful things are still inside us and we can
make something beautiful out of them so hope that helps
um thank you Adrienne for joining us tonight and this is I think this is the last session
um of
you guys coming before the reins retreat next week we have them as our monasteries none will
be coming so um really thanks a lot for today's uh talks and meditation and hope you have a
wonderful reins retreat period in the coming um three months and yeah um maybe we can end with
like um blessing or sharing merit or anything that would be great thank you so much well thank
you for having me and uh i hope you'll all have a wonderful way to treat yourselves and uh to make
the most of what you have so here we go short little blessing
thank you
thank you
well thank you for having me
good night
good night